Absolutely spot-on piece in the NYT magazine this morning about “committing to a bit,” which really hit home for me. In summary, the writer, Jeremy Lawson, argues that one of the things that we can do to make interactions with others more engaging is to have intentionally obtuse quirks of phrase or behavior that are simultaneously harmless and memorable. They serve a lot of the same purpose as dad jokes, in that they’re not so much funny as they are fun.
The piece resonated for me because I’ve often used these kinds of stupid tricks to overcome either social anxiety or to break the ice with people I don’t know well. I went through an “and/or” period, where I’d replace any noun pair conjoined with either an “and” or an “or” with its counterpart, or both, whichever was funnier to me. for example, if someone said “Law and Order,” I’d say back “Law and/or Order.” Or if someone offered a few M&Ms, I’d say back “M or M’s.” It’s stupid and really funny to no one but me. I had a Twitter/X account for a while before Elon torched the platform (RIP @bothandandor) that I maintained to log them, but it seemed like a waste of time since even my most banger examples gained no following (is “Turner and/or Hooch” really not funny to anyone else?), and I can amuse myself without a public social platform. Or apparently I can’t, because here I am writing this.
The piece made me realize how much me and especially my male friends communicate through bits, whether self-deprecating in-jokes, movie quotes, nicknames, puns, malapropisms and song lyrics. It’s a way to bond and to feel a connection without getting weird about it. A silly joke or goofy moment can make a boring meeting feel like it’s being populated by human beings, which, in a busy day, can be the greatest gift. I’m all-in on bits.
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